I was delighted when I was contacted by "The Only One in the Room" podcast. Hosts Laura and Scott have a series that has earned national attention. Getting onto this podcast series takes having a story they feel is worth their precious time and attention. The story of our family's journey after my daughter's tragedy gained us this opportunity. This is quite a comprehensive interview. You will learn much about dating violence. If you know someone who is dating, I promise you this will be worth your time. WhenDatingHurts.com
From a very early age, Victorea Luminary and her father were abused by her alcoholic mother. Finally free from decades of abuse, she innocently ran into even more trouble with two different relationships with narcissists. One was her husband; the other a man she thought was going to become her savior. In vivid detail, Victorea tells of the ways she was lured into these insidious relationships. She explains how narcissists manipulate their prey. With sheer determination, she was able to break free from each man to become the powerful woman and survivor she is today. Learn from Victorea as she takes us some of the scariest experiences imaginable. To find out more about the good works of Victorea Luminary, head to https://takebackyourpowernow.com/
I get a lot of questions via email, Facebook, Instagram, and before and after speeches. I felt it a good idea to answer them for you in this episode. If you have questions or thoughts you 'd like to share, reach me at: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com.
Hi Everyone, This episode is a repeat of the first one in the series. I wanted to remind listeners why we created this podcast. I lost my daughter in 2005 when she was murdered by her ex-boyfriend after she was breaking up with him. Something like that stays with you for a lifetime. It was 17 years ago and feels like yesterday. Since 2005, I wrote a book about what happened with Kristin and gave it the same name as this podcast: WHEN DATING HURTS. That is also the name of all of the speeches I have given over the years. The WHEN DATING HURTS book came out as a paperback. Then an e-book. And lastly, an audiobook. The idea has always been that we learned many important insights about how to detect unhealthy relationships, and what to do to break free safely. We felt it our responsibility to share what we had learned. So, therefore, the podcast series. The wonderful thing about podcasts is I can record one, edit it and share it all in the same day. I could not do that with a book. I hope you listen to some of the episodes in this podcast series. There are 40 in all. I would love for you to share these with those you know who have children in high school or college. Consider this fact: one and three women will suffer serious physical harm from an intimate partner during their lifetimes. It typically happens between the ages of 16 and 24, but can happen to any woman at any age. It is shocking. Thank you for listening to this. I hope you subscribe to this WHEN DATING HURTS series.
This time, I speak with Tony Lapp, the Executive Director at Courdea. Tony is also an experienced trainer, educator, writer, and therapist. Courdea is serving the Philadelphia area by providing a thorough treatment program for abusers and harmful partners (who are mainly men—but can also be women). Courdea offers training, consultation, group therapy, trauma-focused therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and independent general therapy. This organization sprang forth from the idea of getting to the root of relationship abuse. It’s all about treating the person who is doing the hurting with respect and warmth. Courdea’s tagline is” “Helping people become safe partners”. You can contact Courdea today at https://www.courdea.org/
The WHEN DATING HURTS podcast has covered many facets of the domestic violence issue. But this one is new to us. Abusers often have patterns of violence towards all members of a household including children and pets. It’s difficult enough for the abused to find shelter for themselves. For that reason, many survivors stay in abusive homes for fear of subjecting their pets to continued abuse if left behind. And sometimes, it’s not only abuse, it’s torture or death. RedRover, established in 1987, sought to do something to bring animals out of crisis. We will talk about the work of this wonderful organization with Katie Campbell, RedRover’s Director of Collaboration and Outreach. Contact RedRover here.
"Sara" is a domestic violence survivor. She is also my cousin. Sara appeared to be in a perfect marriage. A nice home and three healthy boys. But her ex-husband eventually devolved into a serial abuser. She did all she could to coerce him into getting help, but nothing seemed to work. When living with this man became dangerous, she needed to break free. Listen to a narrative of patience and courage. Sara took years before she could tell her story. We applaud her for sharing it with us on the WHEN DATING HURTS podcast.
Susan Saurman and I met in early 2021 when we traded emails soon after she read my book. She told me her upbringing was in a home made terrifying by domestic violence perpetrated by her cruel tyrannical father. In this WHEN DATING HURTS episode, you will hear Susan describe her young life of abuse and tragedy. She describes an abusive upbringing, paralyzing fear she suffered, and events leading up to the murder of her mother when Susan was 14. Somehow she managed to turn her story into a breathtaking narrative of courage and ascendence. She ultimately found the strength to become the extraordinary survivor she is today. You will never forget what Susan tells us.You can read Susan's entire story in her newly published memoir, The Courage I Learned. Find it in paperback and ebook on Amazon.
On this special WHEN DATING HURTS episode, we include segments from some of our most remarkable moments in 2021. You will hear from survivors and domestic violence counselors whose insights help us better understand dating (and domestic) violence, how to detect it, how to cope, and ways to safely break free. It's worth your time if you know someone in or entering high school or college. Soon, we will be uploading more segments from 2021— plus adding all-new interviews. If you haven’t yet, consider subscribing to the WHEN DATING HURTS podcast series. Reminder: the brand new audiobook version of the WHEN DATING HURTS book is now available on Amazon. And, you can learn more about what we are doing. Head to WhenDatingHurts.com.
Scott Johnson is the host of What Was That Like. His podcast is one of the most-followed podcasts in the country with more than 20,000 downloads per month! It is quite an honor to be able to tell our daughter's story on Scott's powerful podcast. He is an excellent interviewer; you will hear it yourself here. For more information about the What Was That Like podcast, here's Scott's website: https://whatwasthatlike.com/.